SINGLE BUT NOT ALONE
Originally Posted on May 13, 2009 at 5:07 AM
Whenever someone ask me if I have a boyfriend and I would tell them i have none since birth, they would always react in astonishment or shock as if having no boyfriend at my age is a crime. Their reactions doesn't bother me though. I know the standards of the world. IT says that you are important or beautiful if you have a boy/girlfriend. Your boy/girlfriend can complete you. He/she can make you happy and so on. Many enter such relationship to have a "trophy" while others are just doing it just for the fun of it or because almost all of the people are doing it and they don't want to be "IN" the trend. And still some were pressured by peers.
I don't want to enter a relationship for wrong reasons. I don't want to enter a relationship only to end it while giving away my heart piece by piece until there is nothing left I can give to the one God created just for me. I will be faithful to him even if we haven't met yet and I hope he is too. If i can be faithful to him before we met, i know i will be faithful when I'll finally met him. For now i would focus on developing my character so that i would be a good friend and wife to whoever he is.
While I'm waiting, i will concentrate more on knowing God deeper before giving my heart to a man. I want to experience God's love first. I cannot know what true love is if I don't know God.
Many people tell me:
"That's silly! Why wait when you can chase or find them. How will you ever met him if you will just sit there and so nothing!"
" Someone will get him before you do."
"God is too busy that He wouldn't bother himself finding a match!"
They gave me the impression that love is a contest or a treasure hunting. Whoever finds him/her first wins and the others are losers. It is not. Tell me, with your finding and chasing, what do you find? How so you know that he is the one? Does he met your standards fo your 'perfect man?' What are you looking for man/woman anyway?
I just cant rely on my list of a dream man. I admit, I had an ideal man too. He should be caring, loving, understanding, and gives time to listen. He must also possessed talents in playing guitar or instruments and could sing so he could serenade me, or write me a song or paint me. But these are just my preference today. It is not absolute! Tomorrow it could be different.
Honestly, i dont exactly know what i am really looking for a man. It's just too vague. If I'll met the man i have imagined, will he be able to meet my expectations or will i be disappointed? what if out of ten(10), he got only 8 checks on the boxes of my list? will i dump him and look for someone all over again who will get a 10-10 score? The question is, is there someone who will be perfect just like i imagined him to be? The search will have no end.
I dont really know what i want or like. I will depend and leave this matter to the One who can truly understands me. I know He knows what and who is suited for me or who i am suitable t. He is my/our Creator so He know exactly what's best for us. Only the invertor know exactly His invention and only an engineer or architect can understand the blueprint.
God does care about our love life you know and He takes pleasure on it. Besides, He is the matchmaker of the first couple ever. Adam and Eve. God knows who/what's best for Adam so He gave Him Eve. Do not forget God is the Author of Love. He is love. That's the very nature of God. Im sure God smiled as He watch Adam when He saw the twinkle in Adam's eyes when he behold Eve. I believe Eve's eyes sparkled too. When Adam laid eyes on Eve, he knows she is the one.(Genesis 2:1)
If i will get married, it will be a match made in heaven. A God-written love story.
If God cared for Adam's lovelife, why think He doesnt care for mine too.
Remember, God is a God of detail. He form every part of your body and He wants to be involved in your life too. We just often shove Him away.
"So what if im not your average girl
I dont follow the standard of this world
Chasing after boys is not my thing
See im waiting for a wedding ring
Im just waiting
Like sleeping beauty my prince will come for me
Cause God is writing my love story"